Monday, August 23, 2004

The Difference Between Men and Boys....

The response to my last post regarding change was overwhelming. Thank you to all who responded - I don't deserve your accolades. I merely take the time to put on paper (virtual paper, anyway) what everyone is thinking about in their own lives. Truth is, it's easier to express yourself in writing. For me, it's a combination of therapy and record keeping. It's a document of my life. Without this blog, I would remember nothing. Those who know me well are aware of my lousy memory. Thank goodness for this medium!!! Gotta love computers.

Had a stuttering moment with Elijah last week. He came home from camp and told Deb that he could "only feel one of my tensticles." Deb told him that I would take a look that night in the bath. Now, I am overly sensitive to this subject because I was born with a double hernia and had it corrected when I was just about Elijah's age. So...that night in the bath Elijah reminded me, "Daddy, I can only feel one of my tensticles." So I asked him to stand up and I would check them for him. He did and I found 'em both. I told him, "You have two! Perfect!! Everything is there Elijah - there's no need to worry."

"But they are so small, Daddy. So is my penis. Are they going to get bigger when I grow up?"

"Um....yes! Everything gets bigger when you grow up. Your hands, feet, legs, everything."


"Can I feel YOURS Daddy?"

"HOW ABOUT THOSE PHILLIES, HUH? Man, I thought the season was over there for a few days and now they are playing well how about this weather we are having - perfect for throwing your balls...I mean...throwing the ball around and your sister can wash herself now and wow - how about that great dinner Mommy made today..."

One for the books.

Kids will always say things that make you laugh - especially when they are figuring out their world. Other times they get serious and really ask tough questions. That night, after the tensticle bath, I was laying in bed with Elijah. We had finished reading a few books and were just talking and he asked me about going to Disney World in California. I thought that was strange because I didn't even know he knew what California was. Then he asked me about Disney World in Florida. We went there when he was two. He said, "Remember we saw Poco there and then Poco came to my house?" Poco is my friend Kenny's dog. We saw them when we went to Disney and they visited us last month here. I said I remembered and he asked where Poco lives now and I told him Maryland. "That's where Aunt Amy lives!!" I was shocked! He knows what STATES his relatives live in? Then, for some reason, he asked me where Zeide Abe lives. Zeide Abe died earlier this year. I said, "Well, Zeide Abe used to live in Florida but he died this year."

"Where does he live now?"

"Well, he lives in heaven now," as I pointed to the sky.

Elijah looked a bit confused and asked me if Zeide Abe was shot. I said he wasn't shot, that he was just very old and had a disease and he died from that."

I think he thought that people only die when they get shot. Last week, when visiting Buba at the Geriatric Home, we saw a woman who was locked in a smile, starting at the ceiling with her finger pointing up. She was locked in that position and would not move. It was creepy but not out of place in the home. Elijah had seen this woman and had pointed out to us that she was "frozen." It freaked him out.

After asking about Zeide Abe, he said, "Daddy, remember in the Shabbat House (he calls the Geriatric Home the Shabbat House) we saw that lady who was frozen? Was she shot?"

"No," I explained. "She is just veeerrry old and sick."

"All the other people at the Shabbat House are old and they are not frozen," he said.

So I explained, as best as I could, about getting old and sometimes people get sick. He said that Buba was walking at my wedding and now she's not; was she sick? So I explained that too.

It was an incredible conversation and I am sure he was thinking about that a lot. Elijah is in a unique situation because of Buba being in the home. He sees all of these elderly people in all sorts of conditions and he's only 4 1/2 years old. Most of them are lucid and talk to him and he entertains them. Some of them are not so nice and some are dilusional and, well, frozen.

One thing's for sure...Elijah has developed a very soft spot for the elderly and I hope it stays with him forever.


No comments: